Push

Have you ever wanted to cry
SO hard
That you push
and push
and push
and nothing comes out?
Not even a single tear
No salt
No liquid
Just dry
and empty
and worthless
Like you have exerted
ALL
of the emotion left in your body
and it hurts worse than crying
because at least with the tears
you were letting something go
Washing away your problems
for a brief moment in time
but you don't
and you cant
and you force it
and push it
but still
nothing
You end up sitting around wondering
WHY?!
there is nothing...
You want to cry like a baby
Cradled, snug in your mothers arms.
Like when you were a child
and you scraped your knee for the first time.
You want to cry like this was your first heartbreak
When you were 15 and your girlfriend stole your skateboard
You want to cry like you will never see the burning hues of the sunrise and sunset
again
You want to cry like your mother
and father
and sister and brother
You want to cry like your friends
There used to be feeling in doing that
There used to be something
but you cant cry anymore
and you want to
SO hard
that you push